U.S. Army 1st Lt. Chuck Toblerone, a veteran of two tours in the War in Iraq, is rethinking his election strategy as a "values voter" after insurgents opened fire on him last month, wounding his buttocks seven times.
"In the last two elections, I went with Bush because I appreciated the family values he stood for," Toblerone said from his hospital bed at Walter Reed Hospital. "You know, like low taxes, cheap oil and no gays. But in this next election, I think I'll go with someone who will get us out of Iraq so I don't get my ass shot off again."
Toblerone represents just one voice in a growing chorus of former evangelical and religious voters who voted overwhelmingly for Bush in 2000 and 2004, but have now decided to vote in the complete opposite direction after seeing loved ones -- or themselves -- wounded in combat.
"Look, man," Toblerone said with a grimace, "I really, really, really, really, really, really, really don't want to get shot again. That's one 'really' for each bullet in my ass. If it takes voting for Ron Paul or Dennis Kucinich to make that happen, then so be it."